I feel like I should be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
There's just too many things getting in the way of that.
My complete lack of a social life, my debt, my scrawny 10 year-old-boy body, my empty portfolio. Everything just gets in the way of the fact that I won't be stuck in this rut for too much longer. I won't have the pressures of project deadlines; the life of an undergraduate. I won't have the less-than-perfect schedule.
But where will I be? What do average grades and absolutely no polished works get me? Who's going to hire someone who only pays attention to part of the material, and how do I sell myself when I've got so many doubts?
Clearly, I'm not the worst at what I do. I've made it this far with all the challenges along the way. The person sitting on the other side of the table must deem me competent though. How am I supposed to convince them that I am while I don't believe it myself?
The worst part of it all is that I don't know what course to take from here. I should be applying for as many jobs as I can right now, I think. Or, I should be fixing up my old projects and get them ready to show my interviewer. Or, I should be starting something new, something exciting. Or, I should be drinking and doing drugs and try to enjoy the last semester of my college life like the frat guys at that school I failed out of.
One things for sure; all of those new video games are not going to help me find what I want.
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